LEARN TO TALK LIKE MORTY SHARP!!!!!

 

 

HI FRIENDS, MORTY SHARP HERE. YOU MAY REMEMBER ME FROM MY FAMOUS HOMEPAGE OR PERHAPS I HAVE SOLD YOU SOME REAL ESTATE. I AM ALSO A BIT OF A REGIONAL CELEBRITY IN MY HOMETOWN OF COURAGE FALLS MINNESOTA. ITS A GREAT PLACE.

WELL, NOW THAT WE HAVE ESTABLISHED THAT WE KNOW WHO I AM I WOULD LIKE TO GIVE YOU THE OPPORTUNITY TO LEARN TO TLAK LIKE ME, MORTY SHARP ! I HAVE DEVELOPED A NOVEL NEW COURSE FOR MY PROFESSIONAL SPEECH AS I HAVE BASED IT OFF OF THE COMBINED ACCENTS OF LOCAL ANCHORMEN AND WOMEN.

THUS I PRESENT TO YOU "MORTY SHARPS WASPONICS!"

WASPONICS IS A GREAT NEW SYSTEM FOR LEARNING TO TALK LIKE ME, MORTY SHARP, A HAPLESS FUCKWIT.

WITH THE WORLD SO BIG AND CLOSE TOGETHER NOW IT IS IMPORTANT THAT WE ALL LEARN TO SPEAK AND WRITE LIKE MIDWESTERNERS, WHO ARE IMPORTANT IN THE WORLD OF POLITICS.

THIS IS NOT A SCRAME! 100% GUARANTEED RESULTS OR YOUR MONEY BACK! I MORTY SHARP GIVE YOU MY PERSONAL GARANTEE!

HERE ARE MY TESTIMONIALS!:

"I WAS DOUBTFUL ABOUT MORTY SHARPS GARANTEE THAT I WOULD TALK AND TYP JUST LIKE HIM, BUT HIS PRMOISES CAME TRUE. I EVEN LOOK JUST LIEK HIM!" --JAMES MANZAPITA

"AS A PERENNIAL VICTIM OF EBONICS AND THE LIBERAL AFFERMATIVE ACTION CONSPIRACTY I NEEDED TO LEARN TO TALK LIKE MIDDLECLASS WHITE PEOPLE WHO ARE NOT CATHOLICS TO GARNAR SAPPORT FOR MY POLITCIL CAREER" --COLON POWERR

"I LIKED IT MORE THAN SPORTS BY HUEY LEWIS AND THE LION KING MUSICALL PUT TOGETHRER" -- SALLY

IF THAT DOES NOT CONVINCE YOU OF THE POWER OF MORTY SHARPS WASPONICS THEN NOTHING WILL. THIS SIX WEEK INSTENSIOVE PROGAMME W9IL TEACH YOU THE VALUE OF THE WASP - WHITE ANGLO-SAXON PROTESTANTS AND WHY IT IS BETTER IF THE REST OF THE WORLD TALKS LIKE US.

FOR MORE INFORMATION MAIL ME, MORTY SHARP AT MORTYSHARP@SCRAME.COM